


A Church, To: Ambition & Affection

by Cherith



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Free Verse, Multi, Nicknames, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-28
Updated: 2015-11-28
Packaged: 2018-05-03 19:33:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5304020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cherith/pseuds/Cherith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A free verse poem inspired by the letters between Angelica and Alexander.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Church, To: Ambition & Affection

You say:  
_Our dear Affection cries out to the ocean_.  
I cannot blame her  
When my voice often screams in tune with hers  
So often I find it difficult  
To shake my fists  
Or raise a pen  
At the idea of anything but returning to you both.

What is an ocean, but water, and  
Tears I have shed enough in my desire  
To be in your company.

I am of two hearts. Neither mine and  
Both of the same name, the same home,  
The same love.  
They remember me in the dark of night  
At the first light of the sun  
And they love me  
So fiercely  
I know a mere letter cannot capture it.

But let me posit an ocean  
With no more power over us  
Than the power of this pen  
Or yours. I tell you, Ambition, of my love  
And my heart tells me that  
Love will return to me two-fold.

Let me tell you of weeks and days and  
Moments that cannot pass  
Because thinking or breathing,  
And living,  
Is to remember another home exists  
And that it is not here.  
To exist  
I can do little else but remember  
Those who love me,  
Those who cannot be where I am  
But send through the ink and this paper their intentions,  
Their love,  
Their deepest affections and not a drop of water  
For the crossing of the such an ocean.

A different sort of woman, _brother_ ,  
Could remind you of the thing you have  
I have not;  
A different sort of woman, _sister_ ,  
Could do the same.

Let the waves carry my wishes  
I could lay claim to the offer  
On both hearts. 

I could lie and say:  
_I do not dream_ , and cannot for fear  
Dreams will drive me to madness, further  
Into despair or worse  
To hope.

I could not describe such dreams, nor dare  
Explanation of my participation  
When such dreams take me.

The unfortunate truth, for me  
Is that I dream too often  
Waking and sleeping, there are visions  
Of me, there  
Of you, here  
And more and more and more. This separation  
Leaves more than an ocean between us  
And ocean I would willingly cross  
To give an hour to the generosity of my sister,  
Of my brother,  
And satisfaction.

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the many letters between Angelica and Alexander, but very specifically [this one](https://founders.archives.gov/documents/Hamilton/01-15-02-0178).


End file.
